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You are Here: Home > Love Stories > My First Love > is he the one???

is he the one???
by kim
i love him,. since we were grade school,. i never knew it will grow until high school..
i felt strong connection to him.. but is he one?

i named him ren (not real name)
he was a transferee from our class when i was grade five,,. i admire him for some reasons.. When we were freshmen i told my friend what i feel toward ren, and i never knew that my friend will tell him.. i thought it was ok, hes not my classmate anymore,.and theres nothing to worry, until we were juniors, i never expected tat he will going to be my classmate.. i don't know how to talk to him i felt embarrassed..but he didn't, he talk to me as if he don't know what i feel for him..the first three months being classmate to him was fine,but one day he told to her best friend that he knows that i have a feelings for him.. and that guy tell it to my other classmate,. it was really embarrassing,.and after that we feel uncomfortable to each other,we never talk to each other anymore until were seniors....and were not classmates anymore, i made a space between us,i wanted to forget him cause i was hurt.. but the time was so playful, there was an issue about me, that im the reason for the break up of ren and her girlfriend.. who's my former classmate and a if i was the third party..i was hurt, and cried so hard that time specially when i discovered that that was the craziest damn plan of one teacher of our school..i text ren but he said that it wasn't true..
and when i attend our prom, he dance me and we have not so long conversation,.thats the first time we talked again to each other personally since we were juniors.. after that was the graduation.. and we will never see each other again after a long time.. we have communication but we lose it after 5 months..and after 3 months, i said that i was completely forgot him,i now move on..And i heard the news that her mother passed away,i guess this time im ready to see him to prove that i have no feelings for him anymore,so we went to their house to give some support, and we have a conversation again, after that i was happy...i dont know why.. but that happiness was the happiness i felt when we were juniors, and then i realized that i still love him...i hate it!! i dont want this feelings anymore! i was hurt many times,but here i am, still loving him,..
and now i start to get over him...
this time i promised to myself to have some space between us for a long time...
and that will i do....
help me god!!!
i felt empty this time,.
i must do this,
the future tells if he's
the one for me!!

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